Yes Bad Thoughts, Again Today
Feb. 24th, 2021 09:09 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rynlingA lot of people on social media have been talking about how it’s been difficult to write recently because they’re suffering from a mental illness or just general stress, and I get that. I’ve been there.
What I’m suffering from at the moment, however, is that I don’t have any connections that will help me publish my writing. It’s not that I’ll never be “a writer” because I can’t write, but rather that no one has held the door open for me and gestured me inside and asked, “Hey, can you write for us?”
Also, I am a very shy and very delicate flower.
And also, I’m not “young” anymore. Nobody cares about you if you’re 35 and don’t have any writing credits. You’re basically a professional amateur at that point.
And then also, I actually do have a ton of academic publications, so people who are willing to publish “emerging writers” aren’t interested in me or my work.
So every morning, every time I sit down to write, I have to go through the same cycle of “no one cares” and “this doesn’t matter” and “you’re useless” before I get to the “but do it anyway.”
I’m struggling to get things done this week, but once this week’s deadlines are behind me I think I might have to sit down and make a concrete plan concerning how to spend more time on social media, specifically Twitter. I also think I might take up smoking again.
What I’m suffering from at the moment, however, is that I don’t have any connections that will help me publish my writing. It’s not that I’ll never be “a writer” because I can’t write, but rather that no one has held the door open for me and gestured me inside and asked, “Hey, can you write for us?”
Also, I am a very shy and very delicate flower.
And also, I’m not “young” anymore. Nobody cares about you if you’re 35 and don’t have any writing credits. You’re basically a professional amateur at that point.
And then also, I actually do have a ton of academic publications, so people who are willing to publish “emerging writers” aren’t interested in me or my work.
So every morning, every time I sit down to write, I have to go through the same cycle of “no one cares” and “this doesn’t matter” and “you’re useless” before I get to the “but do it anyway.”
I’m struggling to get things done this week, but once this week’s deadlines are behind me I think I might have to sit down and make a concrete plan concerning how to spend more time on social media, specifically Twitter. I also think I might take up smoking again.
