Rynling R&D

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My summer semester starts soon, but this week I did fuckall except to catch up on some reading. I wouldn’t recommend academia as a profession to anyone, but I can’t deny that it’s quite nice to have a few weeks where it’s your literal paying job just to chill out and read all the articles you’ve downloaded from JSTOR.

Here’s a paragraph-by-paragraph breakdown:

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I generally don’t write negative criticism for four reasons. First, every piece of art is a miracle. Second, each of us only has so many days on this earth. Third, I prefer not to platform bullshit. And fourth, the sort of author who feels confident about putting overt sexism, racism, etc. into their work is also the sort of person who won’t hesitate to launch a vendetta against a reviewer who calls it out.

Also, something that reviewers really like to do is open in a style that I call “2010s recipe blog,” which involves writing two or three paragraphs about a summer you spent with your grandparents or a book you read in college (or whatever) before you mention the work that you’re supposed to be reviewing. There’s a place for this in a certain type of literary magazine, but I generally find it annoying and pretentious as an opener. It’s important for a writer to bring a unique perspective to their review, but it’s also important to respect your readers and not bury the lede.

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I think I can achieve the first four on my own; but, for the fifth, self-publishing really isn't going to cut it. Unfortunately, that’s not up to me, so it’s definitely worth focusing on what I can do without the approval of gatekeepers.

I’m going to be salty about fanfic for a second. This is an extended meditation on what I try to do when I write, but also it’s just me being a petty little hater about a common style of fanfic writing that I find annoying, so feel free to scroll on by.

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So I guess my frustration is: why is that sort of bloodless, limp-dick style of writing so popular?

But also: what can I borrow from this style without betraying my sense of integrity as a craftsman?

An Unfound Door isn’t an adventure story, though it starts as one.

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...which is all well and good, but “tone” and “themes” are difficult to convey in a one-page cover letter! I will keep editing and adjusting and refining and submitting, though.

My wizard detective story “The Case of the Phantom Portrait” was accepted for publication, so I’m thinking it’s time to write a new one.

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Anyway, this story is about creativity and copyright law. And about how the latter shouldn’t exist.

Idk man, sometimes I think about how large animation studios treat their artists, and it makes me want to write stories about murder.

It appears that, once again, I got good solstice energy and spent the period between December 15 and January 15 writing the first 20k words of a novel.

The last time I did this was in Dec 2022 - Jan 2023, and I haven't looked at that project since then. I'm feeling the same sense of "I'm done" with my current project, The Archives of Hyrule, and I need to be careful not to let it fizzle out.

My problem is twofold. First, I'm not in love with the contemporary urban setting. And second, I'm feeling like I really need positive feedback right now. The first problem is easy enough to fix by setting the action inside and underground. As for the second, perhaps it might make sense to post the story on AO3 as a series of three or four "seasons." Maybe I'll let the already-written chapters rest for a bit while working on a few illustrations, and then I'll go ahead and post them later in the year.

Also, it might be nice to take a break from the Zelda nerds and get real about the "Bowser's Massive Cock Challenge" story I've been threatening to write for months now. I recently read a tidy bunch of Chuck Tingle stories (about the ongoing homosexual adventures of a billionaire T-Rex), and I feel like not everything has to be so serious. Sometimes it's okay just to be pounded in the butt by the physical manifestation of doing what you want and having a good time.

2025 has been a productive year of writing lyrical and well-crafted short stories with unique and original conceits, but this has gotten me nowhere. Now that the semester is over, I will write what people actually want to read. I'm planning a multichapter fanfic titled "Bowser's Massive Cock Challenge," and it will be about... Well. I'm sure you can guess.

I'm not joking btw. Readers need joy, and writers need positive feedback.

(And purity advocates need to go fuck themselves, perhaps literally.)

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So here's the question: I grew up in and around Atlanta and now live in the place I'm writing about. Would it be considered "appropriation" if I wrote the character speaking in my own natural dialect?

And here's the answer: This is not something normal people care about. You can't write in fear of bad-faith dipshits on the internet. As long as I'm not doing some sort of Stephen King level of caricature, I think I'm probably fine.

ETA: I think I got the voice down, and it's good. What gave me trouble ended up being my speculation on what robotics technology will look like fifty years in the future. But again, I decided that it's best to listen to the story itself and not think about the meta too hard.

Story Summary: Zelda has resigned herself to a dingy office in the dustiest section of the museum basement, but her complacency is disturbed by Ganon, a tech investor who demands access to the collection. As Zelda investigates the objects of his interest, she discovers that some of the more obscure holdings in the underground storage vault are more than mere relics. The museum hides a secret that should perhaps remain buried, but Ganon is relentless in his pursuit of knowledge that has long been forbidden. Despite her better judgment, Zelda finds herself drawn along with him into the mystery of the archives.

…that’s a bit rough, but it works, right? Maybe this story will be fun as Zelda fanfic.

I think it might also be cool for every chapter to include something like a tabletop RPG artifact card that consists of an illustration in (this) style along with a short written passage featuring some Dark Souls / Final Fantasy XII flavor text.

I’d also like to create character illustrations, maybe. I’ve always loved the Dragon Age tarot card style, and it might be an interesting project to learn to replicate it.