Glass Onion
Dec. 25th, 2022 08:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I didn’t enjoy Glass Onion as much as I enjoyed Knives Out. This was for purely personal reasons, those reasons being that I love Gothic stories about old houses and that I find both Ana de Armas and Chris Evans to be extremely attractive. Still, I enjoyed Glass Onion a whole lot.
Content warning for spoilers. Nothing explicit, but best to be on the safe side.
Glass Onion is about how Janelle Monáe destroys a cryptocurrency tech billionaire played by Edward Norton. Edward Norton’s character is high-octane cringe from start to finish. You want to see him destroyed, and it’s great when it happens.
Not only is it great when it happens, it happens for a good twenty minutes. Every single one of those minutes is a treasure. There’s none of the tension between the heroine and the villain that pervaded Knives Out; there’s just a billionaire’s life going up in flames. It’s cathartic.
What I appreciate about Glass Onion is that, as part of this destruction, the Mona Lisa is burned. I’ve talked about why I dislike the concept of fine art, and I feel like Glass Onion gets it. It’s not enough to hate the ultrawealthy; you also have to resist the culture of privilege that surrounds them. The beauty and history of the Mona Lisa is all well and good, but its worth as a financial investment and status symbol is nowhere near the value of the dignity of a single third-grade teacher who teaches kids to read.
Anyway, honorable mention goes to Dave Bautista’s thick thighs, as well as the multiple pairs of shorty shorts that enabled them. I was not expecting that from Glass Onion, but what a lovely treat.
Content warning for spoilers. Nothing explicit, but best to be on the safe side.
Glass Onion is about how Janelle Monáe destroys a cryptocurrency tech billionaire played by Edward Norton. Edward Norton’s character is high-octane cringe from start to finish. You want to see him destroyed, and it’s great when it happens.
Not only is it great when it happens, it happens for a good twenty minutes. Every single one of those minutes is a treasure. There’s none of the tension between the heroine and the villain that pervaded Knives Out; there’s just a billionaire’s life going up in flames. It’s cathartic.
What I appreciate about Glass Onion is that, as part of this destruction, the Mona Lisa is burned. I’ve talked about why I dislike the concept of fine art, and I feel like Glass Onion gets it. It’s not enough to hate the ultrawealthy; you also have to resist the culture of privilege that surrounds them. The beauty and history of the Mona Lisa is all well and good, but its worth as a financial investment and status symbol is nowhere near the value of the dignity of a single third-grade teacher who teaches kids to read.
Anyway, honorable mention goes to Dave Bautista’s thick thighs, as well as the multiple pairs of shorty shorts that enabled them. I was not expecting that from Glass Onion, but what a lovely treat.