Re: 2015 Resolutions, Part the First
Dec. 29th, 2015 10:03 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rynlingStop using the word "awesome."
Fuck that. "Awesome" is awesome.
Buy a new t-shirt every month.
This is going to sound gross, and maybe it is gross, but instead of doing this I stopped caring about washing my t-shirts religiously. The less I wash them, the less the machine destroys them, and the fewer I have to buy.
Start dressing like an adult.
I signed up with Tog + Porter, but the stylist I was assigned was either a moron or a text-generating algorithm. I've had better success with a bimonthly subscription to Trunk Club, but only because they send you way more stuff to choose from. I still don't feel like an adult, though.
Only eat potato chips once per week.
What the fuck, I love potato chips. What was I thinking? This was probably a veiled suggestion to lose weight. I did lose weight, but only because I was so stressed out for months at a time that I had several periods in which I stopped eating altogether. After a year of entire days of eating nothing but kale juice and trail mix to prevent myself from passing out, I lost like maybe seven pounds. Dieting is bullshit.
Start using the metric system.
I already use the metric system for work, but using it in daily conversation made me feel like an asshole, so I stopped. In retrospect, this was a stupid resolution. This is America, and in America we speak American.
Rereading these resolutions makes me hate myself. When was I ever this sincere about anything? Did I really think people would suddenly start respecting me if I were thinner and dressed nicer and changed my vocabulary?
Fuck that. "Awesome" is awesome.
Buy a new t-shirt every month.
This is going to sound gross, and maybe it is gross, but instead of doing this I stopped caring about washing my t-shirts religiously. The less I wash them, the less the machine destroys them, and the fewer I have to buy.
Start dressing like an adult.
I signed up with Tog + Porter, but the stylist I was assigned was either a moron or a text-generating algorithm. I've had better success with a bimonthly subscription to Trunk Club, but only because they send you way more stuff to choose from. I still don't feel like an adult, though.
Only eat potato chips once per week.
What the fuck, I love potato chips. What was I thinking? This was probably a veiled suggestion to lose weight. I did lose weight, but only because I was so stressed out for months at a time that I had several periods in which I stopped eating altogether. After a year of entire days of eating nothing but kale juice and trail mix to prevent myself from passing out, I lost like maybe seven pounds. Dieting is bullshit.
Start using the metric system.
I already use the metric system for work, but using it in daily conversation made me feel like an asshole, so I stopped. In retrospect, this was a stupid resolution. This is America, and in America we speak American.
Rereading these resolutions makes me hate myself. When was I ever this sincere about anything? Did I really think people would suddenly start respecting me if I were thinner and dressed nicer and changed my vocabulary?
