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rynlingBecause I don’t follow people who post half-naked selfies on social media, I did not know that Rax King is primarily famous for posting half-naked selfies on social media. I feel tricked, because I genuinely came to this book thinking it would be a collection of essays on popular culture, which is what the reviews and interviews I read led me to believe. Instead, it’s a collection of essays recounting the author’s sad heterosexual sex life.
I don’t care about bad sex with shitty men. I’ve been there, and it’s not that interesting.
What I really care about is The Cheesecake Factory. I have never eaten there, and I will probably never eat there, and it’s exotic and mysterious to me. Did you know that the guy who owns it belongs to some sort of weird sex cult? Which happens to be a different sex cult than the one associated with the owners of the Celestial Seasonings tea brand, which is also mysterious and exotic to me as someone who lives in America but doesn’t know much about the sort of suburban American culture that people who grew up here take for granted.
I’m interested in what the fuck is “Guy Fieri,” not college boys who text you to come over for sex and then, when you show up in a cute outfit, make you spend an hour watching idiotic YouTube videos with their clueless roommate before you give up and go home. Like, did you sleep with a 45-year-old college professor who was cheating on his wife? Good for you, but I’d like to hear more about Jersey Shore and all the other American reality television shows that everyone except me seems to have watched.
I’m also kind of confused about the logistics. If Rax King is only 28 years old, and if she was a full-time student with a part-time job before jumping immediately into a full-time job while also freelancing and doing social media, where did she find the time for so many hundreds of sex partners while also keeping up with tv shows with hundreds of episodes? Does she have sex with multiple people at once while Netflix plays in the background?
Or is this just the life of people who don’t play video games? Idk, I love sex a whole lot, but if you offered me a choice between spending three hundred hours finding all the Korok seeds in Breath of the Wild and three hundred hours of getting dicked down by an anonymous procession of disgusting men who only care about their own orgasms, I’d much rather play video games.
It seems like I’m judging, but I’m really not. Rax King is living her best life, and that’s great. I’m just not interested in reading about the sex she’s having, and I’m disappointed that I didn’t get to read the essays on American culture that I was promised.
I don’t care about bad sex with shitty men. I’ve been there, and it’s not that interesting.
What I really care about is The Cheesecake Factory. I have never eaten there, and I will probably never eat there, and it’s exotic and mysterious to me. Did you know that the guy who owns it belongs to some sort of weird sex cult? Which happens to be a different sex cult than the one associated with the owners of the Celestial Seasonings tea brand, which is also mysterious and exotic to me as someone who lives in America but doesn’t know much about the sort of suburban American culture that people who grew up here take for granted.
I’m interested in what the fuck is “Guy Fieri,” not college boys who text you to come over for sex and then, when you show up in a cute outfit, make you spend an hour watching idiotic YouTube videos with their clueless roommate before you give up and go home. Like, did you sleep with a 45-year-old college professor who was cheating on his wife? Good for you, but I’d like to hear more about Jersey Shore and all the other American reality television shows that everyone except me seems to have watched.
I’m also kind of confused about the logistics. If Rax King is only 28 years old, and if she was a full-time student with a part-time job before jumping immediately into a full-time job while also freelancing and doing social media, where did she find the time for so many hundreds of sex partners while also keeping up with tv shows with hundreds of episodes? Does she have sex with multiple people at once while Netflix plays in the background?
Or is this just the life of people who don’t play video games? Idk, I love sex a whole lot, but if you offered me a choice between spending three hundred hours finding all the Korok seeds in Breath of the Wild and three hundred hours of getting dicked down by an anonymous procession of disgusting men who only care about their own orgasms, I’d much rather play video games.
It seems like I’m judging, but I’m really not. Rax King is living her best life, and that’s great. I’m just not interested in reading about the sex she’s having, and I’m disappointed that I didn’t get to read the essays on American culture that I was promised.
