The Adventures of King Spinach

This past weekend, I was trying to play through the fifth dungeon in Tears of the Kingdom, the Construct Factory. This dungeon is not great, and I don't want to talk about it! Suffice it to say that the dungeon was so shitty that my husband was like, How much does it cost to buy a PlayStation 5.

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If you're wondering what it's like to be chased by a giant monstrous hand-spider across the misty courtyard of a ruined castle in a PlayStation 5 game on a huge Ultra HD television, allow me to assure you that it's fantastic. This is the American Dream.

What Happens to Aerith

I started playing the Final Fantasy VII remake, but I stopped because it was boring. I never went back to it, but my husband watched me play the game and apparently still remembers bits and pieces. The hosts of his favorite English Premier League football podcast all are playing Final Fantasy XVI, so he's watching me play that game too. Yesterday evening, as I was playing FFXVI, he asked me what happens to Jessie.

It took me a second to realize he was talking about the character in FFVII. I was like, She dies.

Then he was like, What happens to "sorry about your ass"? I was like, Wedge? He also dies.

He asked about Barret and Tifa, and I told him they'll be fine. Then he asked about Aerith.

I was like, damn. Should I tell him?